Unsure

Didn’t you noticed, for the past many times you bring up about him, i have no reactions no feelings. You still asked me, no jealous or mad right. So is it I suppose to have no feeling at all?

I bet you didn’t realized my changes, or you thought it should be like that. Every couple will be like that as well, to feel nothing when people are crossing boundaries and doing something out of the zone. That nothing is wrong about that, and people’s girlfriend or boyfriend are also very ok about it.

Or perhaps you like my reaction with nothing at all, so that you can be on your way and continue be friend with “ethical” good friend. Or perhaps i was the one that too exaggerated, too insecure. So i just want to know, you like me giving no response? Or not.

Look Up

Look Up

I have 422 friends yet I am lonely
I speak to all of them everyday yet none of them really know me
The problem I have sits in the space in-between
Looking into their eyes or at a name on a screen

I took a step back and opened my eyes
I looked round and realised
This media we call social is anything but
when we open our computers and it’s our doors we shut

All this technology we have it’s just an illusion
Community, companionship, a sense of inclusion
When you step away from this device of delusion
You awaken to see a world of confusion

A world where we’re slaves to the technology we mastered
Where information gets sold by some rich, greedy bastard
A world of self-interest, self-image, self-promotion
Where we all share our best bits but leave out the emotion

We’re at our most happy with an experience we share
But is it the same if no one is there?
Be there for your friends and they’ll be there too
But no one will be if a group message will do

We edit and exaggerate, crave adulation
We pretend not to notice the social isolation
We put our words into order till our lives are glistening
We don’t even know if anyone is listening

Being alone isn’t the problem let me just emphasise
If you read a book, paint a picture, or do some exercise
You’re being productive and present not reserved and reclused
You’re being awake and attentive and putting your time to good use

So when you’re in public and you start to feel alone
Put your hands behind your head, step away from the phone
You don’t need to stare at your menu or at your contact list
Just talk to one another, learn to co-exist

I can’t stand to hear the silence of a busy commuter train
When no one wants to talk for the fear of looking insane
We’re becoming unsocial, it no longer satisfies
To engage with one another and look into someone’s eyes.

We’re surrounded by children who since they were born
Have watched us living like robots and think it’s the norm
It’s not very likely you’ll make world’s greatest Dad
If you can’t entertain a child without using an iPad

When I was a child I’d never be home
I’d be out with my friends, on our bikes we’d roam
I’d wear holes in my trainers and graze up my knees
Or build our own clubhouse high up in the trees

Now the park is so quiet it gives me a chill
See no children outside and the swings hanging still
There’s no skipping, no hopscotch, no church and no steeple
We’re a generation of idiots, smart phones and dumb people

So look up from your phone, shut down the display
Take in your surroundings, make the most of today
Just one real connection is all it can take
To show you the difference that being there can make

Be there in the moment as she gives you the look
That you remember forever as when love overtook
The time she first held your hand or first kissed your lips
The time you first disagreed but still loved her to bits

The time you don’t have to tell hundreds of what you’ve just done
Because you want to share this moment with just this one.
The time you sell your computer so you can buy a ring
For the girl of your dreams who is now the real thing

The time you want to start a family and the moment when
You first hold your little girl and get to fall in love again
The time she keeps you up at nights and all you want is rest
And the time you wipe away the tears as your baby flees the nest

The time your baby girl returns with a boy for you to hold
And the time he calls you Grandad and makes you feel real old
The time you take in all you’ve made when you’re giving life attention
And how you’re real glad you didn’t waste it by looking down at some invention

The time you hold your wife’s hand, sit down beside her bed.
You tell her that you love her, lay a kiss upon her head.
She then whispers to you quietly as her heart gives a final beat
That she’s lucky she got stopped by that lost boy in the street

But none of these times ever happened. You never had any of this
When you’re too busy looking down, you don’t see the chances you miss

So look up from your phones, shut down those displays
We have a finite existence, a set number of days
Don’t waste your life getting caught in the net
because when the end comes, nothing’s worse than regret

I am guilty too of being part of this machine
this digital world we are heard but not seen
where we type as we talk and read as we chat
where we spend hours together without making eye-contact

So don’t give in to a life where you follow the hype
Give people your love, don’t give them your “like”
Disconnect from the need to be heard and defined
Go out into the world, leave distractions behind

By Gary Turk.
I found this poem done by him is quite nice, it reminds us many things that most of us have already forgotten. Nice!

为什么

考试期大概还有一个星期就到
但我的脑里满满都是你的事情
想到我现在应该就在你的身边
好好的照顾你陪伴在你的左右
但是现实却多加阻拦我的去向

在他不能来你身边的这个时候
我更应该全天候待在你的身边
当他考完了我就会失去这机会
我要是现在不顾一切跑去你那
那我接下来要面对的后果更惨

这种时候难道说要更加理性吗？
还是说遵从自己心里的那感觉？

那一天

那一天，

你说怕麻烦到别人，但我知那时的你是最需要有人陪在身边
尽管你说‘没关系’‘不要紧’’一切都好‘，但我知道都不是真的

你的心情转变我全看在眼里
你所打造的坚强盔甲已被现实粉碎
你就稍稍离开了我的视线，眼泪就从你的眼眶落下了
看着你的眼泪落下，我的心也变的苦涩不已

我很想拥抱你，好好的安抚你，告诉你别怕，尽管天塌下来也还有我在
但我没有那个资格和立场
尽管，我知道很多东西，想要做很多东西
有资格和立场的那个人远在它方
如果我真的那么做了，或许真的能够满足我自己，但同时也把你推向十字路口

现在我所能够做的就只有
默默地守护在你身边
祈祷你的健康

我你他

我看着你和他坐在一块儿
心里真的很不是愉快儿
虽说事先知道他的意思
但还是让他快乐一步
这已让我超不爽的

但你却在这事件之后
若无其事的贴些字
有可能是我想太多
但也有可能是真的如字面上的意思
还快乐的出游
当事后知道了
才发现原来自己从来都没站过一席位

我还记得当初
你说的特征和其他点点滴滴
我都有牢牢记着
你说的
我不完全有
但是我发现他完全有
几乎样样都比我高分

我承认我并没有
二十四小时或三百六十五天
都向你展开攻势
但当我展开攻势时
你又可否反应过呢

不得空 忙 下回 迟些 等下
之类之类款式的话语
在一次又一次的
侵蚀着浇湿着我的心
热情慢慢的减少
温情慢慢的消失

难道我真的需要被拒之远外
我虽然并不好看
但也不至于损市容
虽没认识很久
但也有一年半载

难道没有和你常见面
就不能够继续认识下去

看来或许真的要放弃了
你才心满意足吧

11/11

就在六小时之前，我从我朋友那才知道今天是告白日。在告白日站在我的工作岗位上悉数我要推销的产品的好处。虽然我知道在今天和我做同样的东西的人多如沙粒，但，难免还是有些感性的东西憋不住在心理。要我在这个日子里找个人告白，那，那个人就是
你，你，你。。和你，还有你。

有时，我就在想我应不应该对号入座呢? 我的一个哥儿们就告诉我，要对号入座。我也明白他的意思。我对号入座，要是那个人指的并不是我，那就碰了一鼻子灰，显得自恋过渡吧！那要是指的那个人正是我，那等到发觉时才发现一切已经太迟了，就惨了！那，你要我如何是好呢~？戏里边的情侣往往似乎没有类似的问题，难道他们之间的感觉真的那么强？还是他们只是比我更加的勇敢表达自己的感受，然后这么巧的对方也有类似的感觉然后走在一起。但，往往世事难料，犹如神奇宝贝里头的其中一个主人翁，Brock，他见到美的女生都勇敢的冲上去赞美，告白。但，据我所知，他试了几百次都还没成功过。

所以~？等待它的来临吗？似乎有点不切实际吧？

Sem break activities ^^

I know is quite late to update my status...now already week 4 of my short semester. But then I still want to share some of my activities during the semester break XDXD
Well...my brother was heading for a Chinese tradition dancing competition. So I also go to Kota Kinabalu with my parents with car for about 6 hours to watch my brother^^...of course and do some visiting to my aunt.

those are the picture i took...because of the seat of the audience...I can only get the picture from that direction ><...but then I got recorded my brother's team dance ^^ but then somehow I cant upload the video .....@@....so there just only one picture...the ending pose...

Well...after that...We go back at the second day...on the half way..at Kundasang where is quite near to the Mount Kinabalu...I took some photo with my phone there.

 The Purple Ipomoea nil is quite beautiful and from my experience...this colour of these species are hardly can be seen else where....(FYI chinese name is 喇叭花 / 牵牛花 )

Well...this is my fair and plain semester break~~ having time with my family which I love most. ^.^ Hope you can share more time with yours too~